The God Of Sadness
One day I was happy and the next I wasn't. I can't immediately put my finger on what might have started the icy fire in my mind. It seems to have emerged from nothing as if the God of sadness struck me with his sadness bolt. It is not numbing pain or sorrow or anything like that. It's just hovering gloom, hovering over me like a dark cloud raining sadness. Suddenly all the happy things seem less happier. Nostalgia is more powerful. All that can go wrong seems inevitable. Its effect is very subtle. If I am not attentive, I might not even know it is affecting me. As the nostalgic imagery in my mind becomes more profound, I don't want to let go of it. Like a cocaine addict I want to hang onto it, even though I know it is making me sicker. Sometimes I like my sadness a little too much. It makes me a more humble and more compassionate person, someone I would want to be. But everything else about it makes life darker. Ever since I acknowledged its presence, its power over ...